What's the "Why?"

Photo by: CHRISTOPHER DOMBRES

"People don't buy what you do, but why you do it."  So says leadership expert Simon Sinek, whose 18-minute TED Talk* on this subject from 2009 has been seen by nearly 19 million people, and has been translated into 42 languages.

  

With those sorts of statistics behind him, Sinek's theory must hold some serious water. I believe it does, and I believe in what he is saying. Sinek holds up Apple as an example of a company that has succeeded and flourished in an otherwise crowded market, for one simple reason. 

According to Sinek's analysis, Apple doesn't sell products - whether they be Mac laptop computers or iPhones or iPads or AppleTVs. Instead, Apple explains its beliefs, and people who share those beliefs want to be a part of what Apple is doing. Those are the people standing in line for days, waiting for the newest Apple innovation to be released.

In other words, Apple doesn't promote what it does, but why it does it - and the stunning results it has reaped speak for themselves.

I believe the same philosophy applies just as strongly to interpersonal relationships as it does in business. It's not so much what we do that attracts other people to our orbit, but why we do it. 

What do we believe in? 

Why are relationships with other people important to us? 

Where are the common bonds that make us happy, comforted, and loved?

It's not the "what," or even the "how" of our behaviors and decisions and outcomes that matter most. It's always the "why." And when we can start from that perspective and live based on that philosophy, relationships can blossom and grow.

Be well,

Eric 

Starring You

Starring You

Photo By: ARMLE

Did you ever think of your life as a movie?

You know, where you're the star, and there's a supporting cast of characters, and you overcome some obstacle and achieve your goal, and reach a happy ending?  Wouldn't that be a great movie?

No?  What do you mean, no?

Oh, you don't think there's enough of a story there.  Not sufficient drama.  Nobody would pay to see a movie about you.  Is that it?

Well, I'm here to tell you that you're wrong.  Completely wrong. Spectacularly wrong.  Every life tells a story.  You grow up and your parents, teachers, neighbors, and friends help form it.  It takes shape in your mind, and that story can either be one of hope, happiness, and confidence - or one of fear, hesitancy, and doubt.  As long as you hold onto it, it remains your story.

But here's where the dramatic part comes in.  If you don't like your story, or if you know that your story could be redirected, improved, made more positive and strong, you can change it.  It may take some courage.  It may take some risk.  It may take some faith.  But it can happen.

Think of scrawny Steve Rogers, who couldn't pass his physical to join the U.S. Army during World War II - but who refused to accept that story of weakness and failure, and instead volunteered to become Captain America.  

Think of Rocky Balboa, who eked out a living breaking bones for a Philadelphia loanshark and who fought in grimy clubs at night for a few bucks - but who refused to continue with that story, and earned his self-respect and the love of a girl on his way to the world heavyweight championship.

Yes, those are fictional characters, projected larger than life on 30-foot theater screens.  But the idea's the same.  If you don't like your story, you can change it.  Nobody else can do it.  Nobody else would even know where to start.  

But you do. You can. You must.

Every life tells a story. A story that would make a great movie.  Even your story.  But deciding to change it for the better will always be up to you. Today could be the day.

 

Be Well,

Eric